Body language blunders: How to avoid sending mixed signals

Research suggests human communication is about 80% nonverbal, so being able to read and send the right messages with your body is important but it's not always easy! Here's a breakdown of some of the biggest body language mistakes we make.

Invading personal space

Standing too close to someone (nearer than one and a half feet) suggests that you have no understanding of personal space, and an invasion of personal space can make people feel uncomfortable. Approximately 4 to 8 feet is an appropriate distance to keep with work colleagues and acquaintances. Here's a good rule of thumb put your hand in front of you and if you touch someone, you're too close.

Exaggerated nodding

Nodding is a crucial part of communication and it lets other people know you understand or agree with what they're saying. However, doing it too much can make you seem weak. It can also come across as a sign of indifference.

Touching

We believe touching others is a sign of affection, but touch can communicate many things. Some studies among genders suggest that men may touch women as a sign of dominance. Another study found that when female wait staff touched their customers when delivering the bill, they received larger tips. In appropriate situations, touching someone lightly is a great way to begin building a bond but use your whole hand. Touching someone with one finger can come across as aggressive.

Misunderstanding/misinterpreting smiles

Research has shown that people (women in particular) cover discomfort with a smile. The problem was that some men interpreted this positively as a seductive invitation. To tell a true smile apart from a fake smile is all in the eyes a true smile is called a Duchenne Smile. It includes narrowed, squinting eyes and crow's feet at the corners of your eyes.

Failing to mirror

People who are listening closely to what someone else is saying will often unconsciously mirror that person's body language. It is often a sign that the conversation is going well. This is a great technique in negotiations. But don't be too obvious about it! The more natural you are the better. If not, you may just come across as phony.